Queen Amidala - I Love You

It seems as though Princess Leia's mom has turned to the Dark Side of The Force! That's right, you better recognize, or Padme will bust a cap in your ass.



Pretty funny! I have new found respect for Natalie Portman. Enjoy, and Happy Hump Day!

Baba Ganoush, OUT!

Quizzes and Cats

It may come as a bit of a surprise to you guys, but I have a bit of an ego. My favorite way to feed that ego, is to be right about things. If you want to play a "friendly" game of chess, I am NOT your guy. So, when I found "Do You Deserve Your High School Diploma" on Anna Banana's blog, clicking on the link and taking the quiz was instinct.

To be honest, I was a little worried about what the outcome might be. I've heard the stories that it's actually harder to get a GED than it is to get a HS Diploma (or maybe that's just something they tell GED students to make them feel better), and that most adults could not pass a GED exam.

I scored an 86%, and despite the fact that the site seems to think that's a good score, it's just B to B+.

I am curious to see how you guys do. Visit the link above, and post your score in the comments. Try to play fair and not look anything up and/or use a book (Evil Spock).

You paid attention during 86% of high school!

85-100% You must be an autodidact, because American high schools don't get scores that high! Good show, old chap!

Do you deserve your high school diploma?
Create a Quiz

I have been blogging now for about 4 months (my mission statement). During my short time here, I've seen a lot. Some friends have been made and some friends have been lost (where the hell is Madison anyway?).

It's gotten very trendy to post pictures of your pets. Some people have conversation with their pets - Exhibit A. Some people even use their pets as another identity when posting - Exhibit B (Yeah, it sounds like Dissociative Identity Disorder to me too!).

In an effort to be just as trendy as everyone else, here are a few pics of my pets.










Allow me to introduce you to Bailey (the little one) and Morgan (the big one getting ready to lay the smack down on me for waking them up). Bailey is a girl and Morgan is a boy. Bailey enjoys getting stuck in places she cannot get out of (between walls), knocking cups off the counter, eating plants, and just in general, causing mischief. Morgan enjoys being fat, finding new places to lounge each day, having his belly rubbed and getting punked by Bailey. Both cats are great for cuddling (if you are into that sort of thing), running from the kids, and NOT killing bugs!

Stay tuned for my next road trip, where I will give you guys the details of the trip through the eyes of Bailey, as narrated by Morgan. It should be riveting!

Baba Ganoush, OUT.

Bung Holes, Alzheimers, and Tags

As you can see from the title, I plan to ramble just a tad.

Ramble Part I: First and foremost, my admission of not using toilet paper seems to have caused quite a stir. Therefore, I have decided clarify my stance on TP. I may even convert some of you to my lifestyle!

It all started when I was in college. As a typical guy (and occasional viewer of adult videos), I needed to be ready 24/7 (physically, logistically, and hygienically) for my next random sexual encounter (cause those things happen randomly all the time.....right? Whatever, I have video evidence that says otherwise!). Either way, better to be prepared, than to be caught funky at the library and have to turn down that sexy Tri-Delt for her proposed 8th floor midnight rendezvous because you are not "fresh."

So, I decided to take VERY good care of myself. A fresh haircut once a every 2 weeks. A new pair of shoes once every 6 months. I sometimes showered 4 times a day (once, I showered 6 times in a day ((remember, I was a football player, and we can get funky at times)). I even started to buy clothes on a more frequent basis, rather than always wearing the ones the university provided me. And I started using Moist Flushable Wipes on a daily basis. Fast forward 8 years, and I now use them exclusively.

For those of you thinking of converting to my fresh and clean lifestyle, I should let you know that there is one side-effect. After years of using Moist Wipes, my ass has become as soft as, well, as a baby's ass. Problem is, it is very sensitive and even when using the best and most expensive TP (you know, that double quilted stuff with Aloe), it feels like I am using sand paper.

So, there you have it! Some of you probably think I am weirder than before you have no explanation. But you know what? I would rather have that, than to think some people thought I just walked around all day with a stinky ass!


Ramble Part II: I pride myself on having a great memory. I would not say that I am all that detail oriented (although BSB's Ice Cream Personality Test says otherwise), but I generally remember things well, especially the little details. Generally, I use this gift for evil - arguing! I love to argue, and I love being right!

Lately, though, I've found that I can't remember certain things. My cut-off is generally when I moved from Bloomington, IN to Milwaukee, WI about 6 years ago. I can remember some of the bigger events before that, but I cannot grasp the small things - the details. Is this a bigger problem, or is this just what happens? Either way, I guess it's a good thing I have this blog! So, when I'm 40 and sitting in a rocking chair, drooling on myself, I can remember when I told all you guys about my ass wipe fetish!

Ramble Part III: Seems as though, I've been hit again. Angry Ballerina tagged me to:

1 - Find the nearest book.
2 - Name the book
3 - The author
4 - Turn to page 123
5 - Go to the fifth sentence on the page
6 - Copy out the next three sentences and post to your blog.
7 - Tag three more folks.

Here goes:

1 - I could have gone upstairs and retrieved a non-text book. But that was too far, and I knew where some of my old books were just a few feet away.
2 - Abnormal Psychology (No, I do not like the faces)
3 - Gerald C. Davison and John M. Neale
4 - Alright, if you say so
5 - Does the first sentence count, or is the the first full sentence
6 - Whether experiments are regarded as analogues depends not on the experiment itself but rather on the use to which it is put. We can very readily study avoidance behavior in a white rat. The data collected from such studies are not analogue data if we limit our discussion to the behavior of rats.
7 - I tag AML, Heather Lynn, and Madison (hey, maybe this will bring her back???)

That's all I have to say about all of that!

Baba Ganoush, OUT!

Dude, That's REALLY Weird

Alright, now let me see if I can figure this out. Evil Spock "tags" me, and now I have to share 6 weird things about myself. Okay, sounds fair, here you go:

1. I sleep with a space heater next to my bed. It could be 90 degrees outside and the middle of summer, and I'd still have my heater going. I love the noise it makes and nothing is better than sleeping with warm air blowing on your face!

2. I love to watch all kinds of movies. I especially like scary movies. Problem is, I cannot watch them alone. Whenever the scary parts come on, I hide my face in my hands and watch the screen through my fingers. Recently, I've started just buying scary movies on DVD, and watching them while playing the scary parts in x8 speed.


3. In college, I drank to excess just like most other students. Thing is, for awhile in school I could not hold my liquor very well. I would generally get "sick" at least 1 night every weekend. Weird thing is, I would always make it to the bathroom, but I would sit on the toilet, and get "sick" on the floor right in front of me.

4. I refuse to use toilet paper! In fact, outside of emergencies, I have not used it in 6 years.

5. Playing collegiate sports, I had the pleasure of showering with other men on a daily basis. After a long day of practice, I sometimes felt the need to have a little fun. While showering, I would, on occasion, urinate on a teammate's leg. It was the best watching their reaction when they felt something on their leg that was a little warmer than their shower water.

6. At the tender age of 32, and with a wife and 2 children, I play A LOT of video games. And when I say A LOT, I mean A LOT. We're talking Nintendo Wii, Nintendo Gamecube, Nintendo DS, Playstation 2, Xbox 360, and I will occasionally break out the Atari or Dreamcast. And to validate my weirdness, my Xbox Live GamerTag. For the record, 4765 is very good!



So there you have it. I hope my newly proclaimed weirdness will not drive anyone away.

Oh yeah, I guess I have to tag 4 people. I tag, BSB, Heather Lynn, JLee, and Dan. I look to hearing your innermost weird.

Baba Ganoush, OUT!