WOW, this thing is still on? Go figure!
I thought by now my little blog would be a porn site, or whatever else old Blogger pages turn in to when they are neglected.
I hope everyone is doing well. I hope to spend some time this weekend reading blogs and getting caught up. I may even post something. No promises this time though.
Have a good one.
Baba Ganoush, OUT!
Thanks to my friend Ramzi, who sent this little gem my way. Probably a bit of old news, but pretty funny. Are people really this stupid? Well, at least Miss South Carolina, Lauren Caitlin Upton IS.
I promise to resurrect my blog soon. It's been a crazy and busy summer.
Baba Ganoush, OUT.
TGFI everyone!
Much apologies for not writing. I have a new goal - Bi-weekly posting.
Maybe by the time it starts to get cold again, I can be up to once a week. Anyway, I've missed you all and this little hobby.
Have a great weekend!!!
Oh yeah, is anyone else pissed off they cancelled Studio 60 On The Sunset Strip, or is it just me? I can't believe that show went away, but NBC is still bringing us America's Got Talent, The Singing Bee, and 30 Rock.
Don't get me wrong, I enjoy my share of crappy/meaningless TV too, but come on!
Speaking of crappy TV, my vote for this year's Big Brother 8 winner - Jen. Yeah, I know big surprise. Hmmmm - this turned out to almost be an actual post.
Baba Ganoush - OUT!
50-ish minutes later, I wasn't quite sure what to think. At first, I actually thought my cable had gone out - it couldn't possibly end like the!!! Then anger set in. If I wanted to choose my own adventure, I'd be a script writer. I tune in to TV to be entertained, and in most instances I want closure, and I thought I had none.
I truly think things are left for us to decide what happened. We are left with a lot of things to consider, but the set up and the final scene is fantastic.I enjoy blogging. I really do. Recently, I looked inward to explain my recent sporadic posting. For the most part, I use blogging to get things off my chest. Well, I haven't really had a need to do that lately - things have been going very good.
Baba in a good mood for months on end. Yeah, hard for me to believe too, but why question a good thing. Would my good fortunes be able to survive a week in Bentonville, Arkansas? 1 day in, and we have a verdict.
Following is the time line of the last 24 hours. Enjoy, and yes, I expect some sort of pity!
1:25 EST - Baba boards a Delta Airlines flight en route to Bentonville with a short stop off in Chicago, a change to American Airlines, and then on to my final stop. Served 6 crackers, which should be enough to hold me over until Chitown, where I can get some lunch before my next flight.
1:45 CST - Delta flight lands at O'Hare, and Baba is forced to run and break a sweat getting to his connection.
2:20 CST - Baba arrives at gate to check in as plane is boarding. No time for lunch. Irritation is setting in.
2:25 CST - Baba boards American Airlines plane, which leaves 10 minutes later. Lady next to me has brought McDonald's on the plane.
2:50 CST - The flight attendants start serving from the front of the plane, meaning Baba will be 7th to last out of 190 people to receive his 60 calorie package of snack mix. Lady next to me is in no hurry to eat her food as it sits in the bag.
3:10 CST - McDonald's lady decides to start "picking" at her food. Baba nearly boils over as she takes a few bites of everything and then tosses the rest aside.
3:20 CST - Baba is presented with snack mix - which was AWESOME.
4:05 CST - Baba arrives at NW Arkansas regional airport. While waiting for bags, Baba obtains his rental car.
4:20 - 5:30 CST Baba engages in the following conversation:
Baba: Excuse me sir, I need a little help finding my bag.
Earl: Okay let me check into it for you. *Earl pushes computer buttons for 10 minutes and then disappears for another 30.
Earl: Sir, it looks like you bag was mis-picked and sent to Bismark, North Dakota.
Baba: Okay, where do we go from here?
Earl: After pushing buttons for another 15 minutes - Looks like we can have your bag to you "sometime" tomorrow afternoon.
Baba: I have a meeting very early in the morning tomorrow. I have nothing to wear. Getting my bag to me "sometime" tomorrow afternoon, is NOT acceptable.
Earl: I'm sorry sir, that is as soon as we can get it here.
Baba: So that's it. You send my bag to North Dakota, and you then send me on my way with a sorry bout your luck? I am NOT okay with that!
Earl: Let me talk with my supervisor. *15 minutes pass* It looks like we can get your bag here by 8pm. Our delivery guy comes in at 9pm. We can have your bag to your hotel by 10.
Baba: My bag will be delivered to my hotel by 10 pm tonight?
Earl: Yes.
Baba: That is much more acceptable. Thank you!
5:30 - 6:00 CST - Baba drives to hotel.
I am staying at a Hyatt Place. All rooms feature a 42 in flat screen TV. My room is phenomenal, my bag will be here by 10 pm, and we are going to Carrabba's for dinner - All is right in the world again, and Baba is in danger of not blogging.
9:00 CST - Baba returns to hotel from dinner.
10:15 CST - Baba is still sans bag.
10:20 CST - Baba calls the # provided earlier at the airport.
Automated Voice: your bag is currently at NW Arkansas Regional Airport and is scheduled to be delivered by 12 am CST.
Baba: Operator.
Automated Voice: It sounds like you would like to talk with an operator. Please choose from the following menu so we can best serve you.
Baba: Operator.
Automated Voice: Please choose.....
Baba: OPERATOR!
Operator: How may I help you?
Baba: Your company sent my bag to North Dakota. Earl told me I would have it by 10 pm. It is now 10:30 pm and I have no bag.
Operator: Looks like your bag is scheduled to be delivered to your hotel by 12 am.
Baba: I am tired. I need to iron still. I have to get up at 4 am. Earl said it would be here by 10. This is unacceptable.
Operator: I do not know why you were told that.
Baba: Earl seemed pretty confident in his claim. Can I speak with your supervisor.
*After being on hold for 10 minutes, Baba hops in his car and drives to airport. At some point, Baba is hung up on.*
11:00 CST - Baba obtains bag from rude person, who does not apologize for the travesty that has just occurred.
*While on way back to hotel, Baba call American Airlines Advantage Member number, which he is a member of.* Following is that transcript.
Baba: I would like to talk with someone about my travel earlier today.
"Customer Service Rep:" Do you have a complaint?
Baba: YES, I do.
"Customer Service Rep:" That will have to go to our Quality Assurance Dept. I can give you a Fax # or an Email.
Baba: I would like to call them.
"CSR:" I can give you a Fax # or an Email.
Baba: You mean after everything today, I cannot even talk to a live person about this?
"CSR:" I can give you a Fax # or an Email.
Baba: Can I talk to a supervisor?
11:30 CST - Baba arrives back at hotel, just as I am hung up on again.
11:30 - 12 am CST - Baba unpacks and irons clothes. Baba changes wake up call from 4:15 am to 4:45 am. Baba falls asleep.
3:30 am - Baba wakes up, paranoid he will over-sleep. Over the next hour or so, Baba is in and out of sleep.
5:00 am - After shower, Baba rocks in the fetal position in his room as he weeps.
Baba blogs again.
Baba OUT!
Another weekend, come and gone. I do feel slightly better, and have since Friday night. Great huh? Not really! I feel just bad enough to be a little pissed off, but also just good enough to have expectations of being an active parent instead of lounging around. I have tried to fake it all weekend, but no go.
Since I was looking better, we made plans Saturday to get my daughter's 1 year pictures taken. We are about 3 months late due to continued bruising as she has been trying to get a handle on walking.
The picture session at Sears Portrait studios was nothing short of a fiasco! "Okay, have your 1 yo stand on this X and your 2 yo stand behind her......" Yeah, all of that stand here, sit on this, etc went over like a lead balloon.
It rained here most of the afternoon Saturday, and Lil' 'Dude did not take his standard afternoon nap, so we just hung out and played in the house.
I usually stay up late on Saturdays. This weekend, I was watching one of the NBA playoff games, and decided to be a nice guy, cause that's how I roll, and clean up the entire downstairs (putting things away, dishes, cleaning counters, etc.....) while everyone slept. Truthfully, if you knew me, you'd know that I actually don't roll like this, so I guess that made it all the better of a surprise.
Sunday was the big Toys R Us trip to buy a water table, sand box, and a riding toy. Pretty standard trip. Lil' Dude, or course, wanted everything in the store, but we made it out sans any random toys. I even picked up a little sumthin sumthin for me, I mean the kids.....you guys remember this thing?
And now to the highlight of the weekend. First a little back story. I seem to have developed some sort of allergies in my old age. To combat this, my doc has put me on Zyrtec, which pretty much dries my sinuses out. So much in fact, that I think this is why I have gotten so many sinus infections.
Awhile back I was watching Oprah (yeah, yeah, I know) and she had on Dr. Oz, who was talking about homeopathic remedies for sinus problems. One of the things he highlighted was a Neti Pot, otherwise know as a Nose Bidet, which basically "cleanses" your nasal sinuses.
Then about two weeks after that, we had house guests for the weekend, who had recently used Ear Candles, which are supposed to clear out your ear canals.
So, I made a trip to my local Hippie Store and obtained a Nose Bidet and Ear Candles. I decided Sunday was the day to clear out my melon. When the kids went down for their nap, I had my wife help me with the candles.
Now the directions for using the candles are pretty clear. They also make the process sound simple and easy. My wife wanted to conduct the procedure on our back deck, but I vetoed that, choosing to stay inside (did not want the neighbors seeing me with flaming rolled up wax paper hanging out of my ears.
So, I sit on the couch and my wife lights up the candle, which was about 8 inches long. You are supposed to trim the ashes as the candle burns and stop take them out when the flame get 4 inches from your face.
Well, a mere 2 minutes into this ordeal the flame on the candle was about 6 inches high. The first time my wife went to trim the ashes one missed the paper plate I had selected to catch them, and flew on the couch. She hands me the plate so that she can extinguish the ash on the couch and also get the ashes out that have now reached the carpet.
At that point my face is getting hot and things are sort of chaotic, so I blow out the candle. The carpet is still smoldering a bit, so I put the candle on the plate, set the plate on the arm of the couch and go to get a wet towel to help her out.
Upon getting the carpet under control, one of the kids wakes up. My wife, irritated at what has transpired in the last few minutes, goes upstairs to get Lil' Dude. Rightfully, she is slightly upset that there is now a quarter-sized burn mark in the carpet.
I stand there, assessing what has just gone down, and wonder why there is still sooo much smoke. Oh, it's just the candle still smoldering - On the paper plate - ON THE COUCH! I did what any sane husband would do - I covered the baseball sized burn mark on the arm of the couch with a towel, until I could determine her anger level with the smaller, less visible burn on the floor.
Well, she comes down, and is still very upset. Realizing I wouldn't be able to hide the couch, I told her about it. The reaction was pretty tame, but the look of disgust and disappointment said it all. I place the towel back over the burn, and just put my head down in shame.
Lil' Dude walks over, pulls back the towel, and says "Oh No, Fireman come here?"
Needless to say, we didn't finish my Ear Candling. I may try my nose bidet this afternoon. If I don't blog for awhile, I may be dead because either my wife killed me, or I have drown while clearing out my nasal passages.
Baba Ganoush, OUT!
So here we are again - the weekend is finally here! Still trying to decide what to do this weekend. I am a little under the weather (something I picked up from these unsanitary heathens I live with). Today's food intake consisted of 4 Pop Tarts, a Carmel Ice Cream Drumstick, and 4 cookies. Yeah, that oughta just about get me all the nutrients I need!
So back to the weekend plans. I could take the hour drive down to Louisville, KY. Apparently, they're having a little event at Churchill Downs call The Kentucky Derby. I have been wanting to try a Mint Julep. Whatever happened to Barbaro anyway? Although, I'm sure I'd clean up down there, I'll probably pass on this little event - being in Kentucky 10 times in the last month like I have, is just WAY too much Kentucky time.
Spiderman 3 also starts this weekend - now we're talking. One small problem, well 3 actually. Even before we had 2 bundles of joy enter our life, my wife didn't like going to see movies - I guess I missed the fine print on that one. I, on the other hand, am the type to always want to go see movies in the theaters as they come out.
We are still pretty new to this area, so I haven't met any other guys that I know well enough to go see a movie with. And for a man to go to the movies with another man, you have to know each other pretty well. I have been known to go to a movie now and then by myself. In fact, if memory serves me correctly, I saw the very first Spiderman by myself while I was at a training in St. Louis years ago. Probably not the best option for this weekend - it'll be a little less sad if I go see this by myself during the week after the crowds die down a bit.
Lil' Dude has made his standing request to go to Chucky Cheese, which has quickly become his favorite past time. I have collected about 3,000 tickets, working toward 10,000 to get the motorized car he always asks for. I have already spent about $60 in 3 trips there for a car that probably costs about $50. If I am feeling better this might be a good Sat. or Sun. morning activity.
One of the greats things about living where we live, is that we are only about 5 minutes from King's Island amusement park. Last year, we bought a season pass, and the nice thing about that is we can go, and not feel the need to stay all day. I can usually take about 3 hours before people start pissing me off. I think it's supposed to be nice this weekend, so a little trip to King's Island might be in order.
If I'm not feeling better, it will officially be movie weekend for me. I'll hunker down in the bedroom, make sure I have ample junk food (which is the only thing that doesn't make me sick), and get caught up on some movies I've bought over the last few months.
I have The Illusionist, Deja Vu, The Night Listener, The Break-Up, and An American Haunting all wanting a little quality time with yours truly.
All this weekend talk - it'll be tough to do any work on Friday. Well, I'm sick anyway, maybe I'll get a head start on movie weekend. Have a good one!
Baba Ganoush, OUT.
With my first "actual" post in quite awhile, I'll most likely get myself in trouble. Oh, well. If there was one thing that I learned in college, well at least something that I actually use today - Your dirty laundry is best aired in a public forum. That little tidbit, courtesy of Jerry Springer. I still wonder who Shanequa Baby Daddy is though?
Way back in the day - Before Baba Ganoush started working for The Man, I worked in social services. I didn't have 2 nickels to rub together, and lived on Ramen Noodles, but I was doing good work. Anyway, while working with kids for several years, my personal mission statement was simple - Every moment is a teaching moment. With that in mind, you will surely understand my concern with the recent transgressions at Mi Casa.
I have addressed this issue with my wife several times, and things seem to be getting worse. She has left me with no other choice than to call her out here and subject her to public ridicule.
We try not to let our kids watch too much TV, but what I continually catch her letting my future All-American football player watch can only be described as a blatant sign of defiance.
This morning was the straw that broke Baba's back. Lil' Dude was watching some "educational" show about garbage me. What they do, how they do it, etc..... In short, the program was glorifying a garbage man's job. Now I know we need future garbage men, just like we need future CEOs. I'd just like to shoot a little higher for our kids than the next great "garbage person" - I guess I should be politically correct here, because if my wife has it her way, our little girl will be in waste management as well.
This all started long ago. There were 2 things I put my foot down on when this whole kid thing started - The Wiggles and Teletubbies.
The more evil and developmentally detrimental of the two is a debate that has raged in my circle for decades, well just a few years, but you get the point. They are both unacceptable, but creepy middle aged men always trump strange creatures with TVs on their stomachs talking in some nonsensical language.
True, I thought it was cute the first time he asked, "I watch Wiggle?" It was just that though, cute. It was in no way a request that was going to be met by his Dad.
What do I continue to find recorded on our DVR - The Wiggles! She obviously won't listen to reason, and I can't divorce her for this. So I have resorted to this. Well, this, and erasing them before they teach anyone in my household that creepy, strange, middle-aged men are friendly and fun.
So, let the public ridicule begin!
Baba Ganoush, OUT!
Happy Easter everyone. Can't believe it has been so long since I posted. Just when I thought I was out, JLee pulled me back in - you know I have a soft spot for quizzes.
So, what kind of flirt am I:
| You Are a Super Flirt |
 You love to flirt, so much so that it gets you in trouble. In almost any situation, you find yourself flirting - even when it's inappropriate. You tend to embrace all flirting styles too.. from coy to sexy to playful to serious. And if someone flirts back, you'll crank it up even more! |
Happy Hump Day Everyone! Most people hate Wednesdays, but I love them. About the time of day I usually say to myself, "today sucks," I remember that Wednesdays are Lost nights.
This season has been especially good. And I appreciate ABC keeping the show on throughout the season without repeats. That helps to keep my Wednesdays the best day of the week. No idea what I'll do when the season is over - we'll cross that bridge when we come to it.
Something happened to me last week. I lost my voice - no, it was not on a deserted island. I have been hoarse before, but I have never lost my voice completely like I did last week.
I had a 2 hour drive from Cincinnati to Louisville and then back again in one day. If you have never had the pleasure of making this drive, let me tell you - it is awful. There is literally nothing for 2 hours. On this particular trip, I got reacquainted with my Pop Mix CD. Prince and I had several jam sessions with Little Red Corvette, where I showed him how to hit the high notes.
Well, my voice is almost back to normal today. Although I may be in for a relapse. While taking the kids to daycare today, what popped on my XM dial - 69 Boyz with Tootsee Roll. They are both still young enough for me to make an ass of myself in front of them without embarrassing them.
To the Left, to the left. To the Right, to the right. To the Front, to the front. To the Back, to the back. Now Dip Baby! Come on now dip!
I am off to see if The World's Largest Retailer is displaying my products like they are supposed to. For my voices sake, I plan on listening to talk radio and XM Comedy all day.
And a video to boot! Have a great rest of the week!
No sure what country these crazy things are from, but they'd probably cause me some problems too!
Baba Ganoush Out!
Since my bracket is already practically worthless, I figured I'd take this time to do a little blogging. In the spirit of March Madness, I thought I'd share a little story with you.
Shortly after graduating from IU, I took a volunteer position coaching Bloomington Indiana's Special Olympic basketball team. I had some experience working with this population, and with my athletic background, I was an easy choice as a Co-Head Coach.
This particular team had won the state championship the previous 2 years. Needless to say, there was some degree of pressure and expectation that came with this position.
Coaching was another story altogether. While trying to teach a proper bounce pass, I also had to deal with the guy, who's first words to me were, "I'm Jordan, just get me the ball. I'm Jordan." Getting this guy to not shoot every time he touched the ball was a full time job in and of itself.
While trying to teach the fundamentals of a 1-2-2 Zone Full Court Press Defense, I had to keep the guy focused, who had no idea what deodorant and/or a shower was.
During games, making sure everyone played was always a challenge. Especially when our Jr. Bobby Knight would throw a chair onto the court. Something he'd do at lease 3 times a game.
You think the AAU parents are bad? You think the soccer mom is tough to deal with. You haven't seen anything until you've dealt with one of these psycho parents.
Yeah, I know, a lot of pressure. Good thing we had our secret weapons. We had 3 guys on our team that were just really stupid. Really stupid. Stupid to the point where the state of Indiana considered them to have an actual disability. Great for me though. I'd stagger their minutes so that I had at least 2 of them on the floor at all times.
I remember our very first game. There was this guy on the other team with one normal arm, and then one chicken wing arm that he couldn't use at all. Funny thing was, he had a great shot. This guy was going nuts on us. At halftime, we were down 16 points and this guy had most of their points.
During my halftime pep talk, I got a little fired up. In front of the whole team, I challenged our best ringer to guard Chicken Wing the rest of the game. "Everywhere he goes, I want you right there with him. If he goes to the bathroom, you're going with him. If he goes to McDonalds, I want you sitting right next to him." My ringer ate up the attention and my team loved it.
Chicken Wing ended up not scoring again, and we won the game. To this day, I can very clearly remember how pitiful and dejected he looked every time he tried to shoot a one-handed J with my ringer hanging all over him. I got a few punches on my express ticket to hell for that one.
Have a great weekend everyone, and enjoy the games!
Baba Ganoush, OUT.
Police Chases
Murders
Stabbings
Robberies
Crystal Meth Labs
Will my Xbox blow up this weekend?
All reported on within the first 10 minutes of my local 11 o'clock news. Home Sweet Home. Seriously, can someone tell me some happy shit!?!
Finally, some happy news - Georgia truck driver wins $116 Million in lottery. Oh yeah, it's all good now!
Despite the fact that I apparently need to pack heat whenever I leave the house, I generally give people the benefit of the doubt. I try to be friendly to strangers and greet people with a smile. But not always. Sometimes, you need to be overly cautious - or do you? Lemme tell you about a time I wasn't so friendly.
I was on my way home from work on a Friday. I can't remember why, but I was in a great mood. I was driving on a 4 lane road with a grass median. I was part of a pack of cars that included a trucker and a few other cars. I was leading the way with the trucker right behind me.
I had just taken off from a stop light, and I noticed 2 young men, who I can only describe as gang bangers, attempting to jay walk about 50 yards in front of me. I slowed down to make sure they could cross, but it was clear they were running out of time. One of the bangers realized this, and stopped on the grass median.
The other gentleman, on the other hand was a little more bold. He decides he is going to walk in front of oncoming traffic (Your's Truly), come to a complete stop, and mock as if he had a gun and was pointing it at my car telling me to stop.
Like I said, I was in a great mood. But having a cap popped in my ass was not what the big guy was looking for.
So, I swurve to the right in an attempt to go get by him on the shoulder. He is getting closer.
As I swurve, he reacted to where I was and jumped into the shoulder. I react to that and swurve left, but he had already reacted and jumped back into the road. 5 feet away now.
At this point, still worried about getting shot, I make my final reaction and head back to the shoulder - this time hitting the gas. Captain Deathwish, reacts back to the shoulder as well, as he flips over my hood stuntman style.
I pull over, now pissed, because I have just hit a person with my SUV. His friend is screaming, as his buddy lays in the road, unable to get up. The trucker stops, and informs us he's called the police.
Jail time flashes before my eyes. Losing my license flashed before my eyes. Me footing the bill for this ass clown to not get a job for the next 5 years flashes before my eyes.
His buddy puts a cell phone in my face and says - "his mom is on the phone, and wants to talk to the person that hit her son." I graciously decline talking to her until the cops get there. She ends up getting there just after the cops.
In the end, the day was saved by the trucker, who saw everything. He stayed to tell the cops the whole story, and that I had no choice because of the guys actions. The two men (who ended up being 16) got jay walking tickets, and I was sent on my way.
Thinking back, I probably didn't need to step on the gas, but hey, as the 11 o'clock news has taught me, you can never be too careful out there.
Baba Ganoush, OUT.
Good Ole Baba Ganoush is a little confused. There's something that I just don't understand, and quite frankly is starting to piss me off!
I'm doing a bit of a hotel tour while traveling for work this week, which gives me plenty of time to ponder life's little mysteries.
Take a look at the following job descriptions, and tell me which one doesn't fit.
Truck Driver - ISO anyone willing drive for hours on end. Must be willing to sleep where you work. Willingness to not sleep for days desired. A general "scary" appearance and/or disposition a bonus. Preferential treatment will be given to anyone who possesses at least 2 of the following characteristics - over 300 lbs., a chain smoker, ownership of a trailer park home, a beard, darked out glasses, a criminal record, or multiple tattoos.
River Boat Casino Regular - Do you wonder what you are going to do with your Social Security check each month? If so, we have the job for you. Looking for individuals who think they have disposable income, but really don't. You will receive special consideration if you are Asian and can smoke at least 3 cigarettes a minute. If you will commit to playing with your rent and utility money every month, you'll be hired immediately.
Traveling Carny - When is the last time you remember taking a shower? In fact, has the combination of soap and water not willing touched your person in years? If so, we have the position for you! Looking for individuals to travel across the country entertaining people with dangerous rides, rigged games, and fried food. If you have fewer than 10 teeth call today!
Customer Service Representative - Are you fresh off the boat? Do you speak broken English, if any at all? Are you at risk of losing your H1-B Visa? If you answered YES to any of these questions, we need you to help English speaking people with problems and questions via phone conversations. Sound like an unbelievable opportunity, don't worry, we thought so too, but it actually exists. Call today - we have mute people waiting to take your call.
Seriously, if I have to talk with 1 more "customer service" person, who I cannot understand, I am going to lose my mind.
If you see me on the news, you now know why!
Baba Ganoush, OUT!
Happy President's Day everyone! I hope you all are enjoying your day! I'm glad to have the day off and all, but I really have nothing to do. The contractors are here finishing their work, which means I can't really leave.
Normally, I'd enter a video game induced coma-like state and not leave the couch, but honestly, I feel a tad guilty sitting on my ass in front of them, while they slave away.
I can't even do what people do when they're home alone - strangers in the house and all. That is what people do when they're home alone, right? I mean doesn't everyone dance around the living room Tom Cruise style? Remember, I am NOT a Deviant!
Knowing her Daddy had an exciting day planned my daughter, who'll be 1 later this week, decided it was time to raise her temp to 101 degrees, and thus, be sent home from daycare.
It made me really reflect on one of life's most important Yin Yangs - the sharing of knowledge. We all have something we can learn from each other. We also have learning's we can teach to others.
I certainly hope she lets her hair grow back before she poses for Playboy, which is undoubtedly the next stop for Trainwreck Britney.So, we've now entered the time of the year where I engage in my favorite past time. Here are the steps:
1) Attempt to find something to watch on the weekends.
2) Find nothing.
3) Try to justify spending over $200 per month on cable by saying, I would watch Aliens 3, Big Momma's House 2, or Dane Cook if I really wanted to.
4) Repeat steps 2 and 3 for hours on end.
Sunday was quite the day for me. It was my day to get up at the butt crack of dawn with the kids. 6 am comes pretty fast when you stay up until 1 am the night before enjoying the late night programming of Showtime and Cinemax.
So, after being up for just 3 hours, I was given the opportunity to go lay down. I proceeded to nap until 1 pm. Further proof that I'm actually 70 years old.
Upon arising from my geriatric slumber, I began, what I can only refer to as - a mini-love affair with VH1.
I started watching with just about 10 minutes left of The Surreal Life - Fame Games. Now 10 minutes is about all I can take of this show. Had there been 15 minutes left, I surely would have thrown in the towel, and went on to something else. But, 10 minutes was just enough to hold my attention, and transition me to Hogan Knows Best.
As a former Hulkamaniac, I have purposely NOT watched this show. I have seen bits and pieces here and there, but I have never watched a whole show. After putting myself through the shame of Flava Flav, I was not about to tarnish the 24 inch pythons.
I'm not sure if it was the promise of seeing some of the other old time WWF stars, or my desire not to admit defeat at the hands of Time Warner Cable, but I was full-blown glued to the TV for an hour. I must say, I was not embarrassed for The Hulkster at all. He seemed like a very laid back and easy going guy. His show was not at all over the top, and it actually made me see him in a whole new light.
I particularly admired the relationship he has with his son. I can't speak much of his relationship with his daughter (she was not in this episode that much), but he seems to genuinely be "friends" with his son, while still maintaining a high level of respect and authority with him.
I decided to take a VH1 break when they dropped The White Rapper Show on my ass. Come on, seriously? I did, however, decide to DVR the show when I noticed one of the best white rappers of all time, MC Serch, was one of the hosts. I knew I had to make up some time, when I saw I Love New York was on after this show, as I will never, and I mean never watch that show.
I was astray for about 2 hours, but VH1 completed me with Best Week Ever. I didn't realize how good laughing at the more fortunate could be.
Now, to the important stuff. I currently have 2 problems that I am dealing with.
First off, Lil' Dude seems to be developing a stuttering problem. It's only when he uses "I" to start a sentence, but I have counted, at times, at least 8 of them. It's always when he's excited, like - "I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I help Daddy with snow blower."
So, question for those of you out there with kids - Is this something that you've experienced, and if so, will it pass? Or, is this one of those things that people will talk about years from now, when they say, "just look how much he has overcome!"
Second problem - my mail carrier. With all the contractors here working on the house, our driveway has been pretty full. A few times, people have parked in front of the mailbox. One day last week, there was a car in front of the mailbox and it was pretty cold here. I kept watching, so I could meet her out there, so she wouldn't have to get out. When I saw her, I rushed out with no coat on. She had pulled past the car by our box to our neighbor's box. I asked her if she had anything for us, and she said yes. While she was handing it to me, I said to her that I wanted to meet you, so you didn't have to get out. She looked at me like, whatever, I wasn't going to get out anyway ass.
Well, yesterday I had to part my car in front of the mailbox. I was not able to watch for her, as I actually had to work. So, I was curious later in the day, if she had left the mail. That would be a negative. I don't know why, but this has my panties all in a bunch. Is it really that much to ask for Newman to get out of her little truck occasionally to deliver the mail? Is it?
I tried to look online to see if I was violating some mailman's code by parking in front of the box, but A) I couldn't find anything and B) I decided that I didn't care either way - I want my mail, even if it means she has to walk her lazy ass all the way up to my front door and hand it to me! I understand it may not be in your job description lady, but whatever happened to going to extra mile (in this case 5 feet) for the customer?
God only knows what would happen to this poor lady if I applied W.W.J.D?
So, there you have it. Gettin' jiggy wit VH1 one day, being stressed out by stuttering children and little miss, I have to be home by noon, mail carrier lady the next.
Baba Ganoush, OUT!
In an effort to balance my Qi, which is currently all out of alignment, I present to you:
That's right, 1 little pipe busts in the wall - several insurance checks later, and the basement has been gutted. Thanks again for the input! I'm excited that this project is finally underway, and I think the finished product is going to be great.
I'll get some pictures up when its all said and done, but until then it's classified.
The Bad
I'm at a little bit of a loss in regards to our childcare. My wife and I decided long ago that one of us staying home was not an option. Well, 2 kids later and we're basically financing a $300,000 home with what we pay for daycare.
We recently got a brochure from Au Pair in America. It looks like an Au Pair would run us around $282 a week. $297, if we wanted one with a 2 year degree.
I don't really think we would ever have someone from a third world country, who speaks quasi-English, live with us, but the savings would be nice. We have seriously considered a live-in nanny, but I would hate to not have Lil' Dude and the other one (no second child syndrome here) lose their social outlet of daycare.
Our little guy loves going to daycare though. I say that, even though this morning, his teacher had to pry him off me kicking and screaming, but he really does like it there. He gets to go and play with friends everyday, and they teach him a little sumthin' sumthin' daily. For example, this week is Dentist Week, where he is learning all about going to the Dentist. Hopefully, he's learning how not to have root canals and crowns.
It was tough when we left Wisconsin and moved here. All of our daycare teachers have been great. I've never once questioned the degree for which they look after our children. I can see their excitement too when they go to see their teachers. I just felt so bad for him. On his last day, he was too young (18 months) to understand that he would never see any of these people again. People, who had looked after him since he was 3 months.
He smiled at them his last day and waved goodbye (one of the many things they watched him learn) like he always did. Who knows if he would even remember them today. And maybe I was just sad for me - at that early of an age, I had already learned that I wouldn't be able to protect him all the time. Because, even if he didn't know it at the time or would remember it months from then, he had just experienced loss. The fact that he didn't know at the time and probably wouldn't remember it only made the situation that more perplexing for me.
The Ugly
First things first - Lisa Marie Nowak. It's scary that a woman, who's obviously off her rocker, managed to become a NASA astronaut. I would make the assumption that if you're crazy enough to wear a diaper in the car so you can make it from Houston to Orlando quicker, in order to maim and/or kill another person, you have probably been whacked out for some time. Just what sort of screening process are we putting astronauts through that this chick made the cut.Secondly, if you missed last night's American Idol, you spent your time a lot more wisely than I. But, if you did happen to see it, can you please help me understand what in the hell was wrong with Jasmine Holland.
Jasmine weighed every bit of 300 Bills, and was very quiet and shy (at first). She comes strolling in wearing what had to be a homemade white tank top with a pair of red spandex pants cut off just below the knees. Not really a good look to begin with, but when you factor in the enormous camel toe she was rocking, it was just disturbing. Simon and Randy started laughing at her the second she walked in the door. They tried to compose themselves, but they just couldn't stop laughing. I honestly felt sorry for he at first, because she seemed a little slow.
I should have known to look away when her family was standing outside with Ryan holding a "Jasmines are next American Idol" sign.
Jasmine proceeds to sing very poorly causing Randy to choke on his water. Yada Yada Yada, Jasmine is crying. She rejoins her family, who crafted the masterpiece "Jasmines are next American Idol" sign, and proceed to bash the judges. In true "are next American Idol" fashion, who of the family members says, "Simon needs to go back to British." Yes, that's right. Not back to Britain, but "back to British."
Now, I don't claim to be a grammar expert (well, at least not all the time). If I am going to hold a sign on national TV, though, I'm going to go ahead and make sure the spelling and grammar "our" correct m'kay. I guess coming from people, who think it's okay to rock a massive camel toe for millions of people, the little grammar issue was not a big deal.
Baba Ganoush, OUT!
I can't really say I'm a Colts fan, but I did live in Indiana for 11 years. As I've said before, I think it's great we're having an all Midwest Super Bowl.
It should be a great game, and since I have to root for someone, I'm picking the Colts. I honestly think the Colts will win. I think the Colts O and the Bears D will be a wash. In the end, the Colts have a much better Defense than the Bears Offense, which should prove to be the difference.
Now, let's get to the good stuff! I'm going to rate my top 5 Super Bowl commercials, and a few other Top 5s. I'm going to try to do this in real time, but might get a little side tracked with pizza deliveries, refreshing beers, and screaming kids.
Here we go:
Well, I made it back from Arkansas. After about 8 hours of daily meetings, I was literally a vegetable.
Monday morning was the dreaded root canal. While I am, as always, NOT a Deviant, I am still a guy. When faced with a tough decision, and given these factors, I will always choose pretty female over guy. This has always been part of my core value system. It was, by all means, a factor when I chose the family dentist. There were other factors - like it being a husband and wife dentistry, who had pictures of their kids in their phone book ad. So, they'll be sensitive to our kids when they go for the first time.
Well, this backfired on me on Monday. When I arrived for my root canal, I was informed that Doctor Chris, and not Doctor Kristina, would be conducting the procedure. As I laid there letting the Novocaine do what it does, I wondered what would be worse - me being a big baby in front of the cute female dentist or in front of the male dentist.
I came to the conclusion, it would be in front of the male dentist. While the female dentist might have seen my vulnerability as cute, a male doctor would no doubt just think I was a bitch. So, I decided to put on my big boy face, and suck it up.
After all the hype, it was really not all that bad. I only felt the pain a few times, and I actually fell asleep a few times during the procedure, which I'm sure Doc. Chris appreciated. That's okay, because I had his giant man hands in my mouth for an hour to help keep it open.
When I was actually awake, I was wondering if this was what Fellatio was like. If so, I can understand some of the trepidation that comes with said act. ***Clarification*** I understand the discomfort. That's not a green light to forgo the deed all together (you know who you are). Let's just say I have a little more respect for those who, suck it up (no pun intended), and git r' dun.
Anywho, where was I? Oh yeah, the pain that I'm in right now is far worse than anything I had imagined with the actual root canal. I feel like someone punched me in the jaw, and then hit me with a brick.
Here's a question for the masses - what do I chose for my crown. I can go with Porcelain, Gold, or Titanium. I go back in on Monday to have the actual crown put on, and I have no idea what to go with. I'll do some research, but I'm curious if anyone else has experience with these.
Changing directions (drastically), I, like most, am getting ready for the Big Game this weekend. I'm pleased that we are having an All Midwest Super Bowl. Cause that's how we roll here in the Midwest! Our TV recently went out, so I came back last week to our new and improved TV.
Not only am I looking forward to a great game this weekend, but I am also looking forward the the Super Bowl Commercials. My wife sent me this clip this morning. It's pretty funny. I have a little bit (and I mean a little bit) of respect for K-Fed now - It's good that he can laugh at himself.
Kevin Federline - Rollin' VIP
Baba Ganoush, OUT!
Baba Ganoush Here - posting remotely from Bentonville, Arkansas. I'll be here all week folks. I'm here for 3 days of meetings. It should be riveting!
The weekend was awesome. Saturday, we got to hang out with friends where my wife and I went to college. Sunday, we were hit with 4 inches of snow, so I finally got to use my snow blower and Lil' Dude and I played for awhile outside.
A pretty lazy post today, but a small look into the mind of Baba Ganoush. Well, not really, but after this post you'll have an idea of some of the music I'm in to.
Sorry, in advance, for this week's post, but technically, I supposed to be working.
This song is in my Top 10 of all time. I must warn you that the audio on the song is VERY loud, so adjust your volume down. Enjoy!
Baba Ganoush, OUT!
WOW, what a week it has been. My world has been turned upside down several times this week, only to rebound with some great news. Wanna here about it? Okay, if you insist!
Saturday and Sunday were filled with NFL playoff bliss. Since my favorite team, The Pittsburgh Steelers, were not in the playoffs, I had to hitch my waggon to another team. I chose the San Diego Chargers. Unfortunately, they lasted just one game. Their loss was the first hill of my roller coaster ride (albeit a small hill).
I then entered utopia Sunday and Monday nights with the help of the Fox Network. My love affair with 24 and American Idol has been well documented.
Tuesday, I awoke to a very pleasant surprise - It finally snowed! Well, only a little bit, but snow nonetheless!
Not enough to built that snowman I promised Lil' Dude, but we're getting there. Rumor has it, more this weekend.
Wednesday was a great day because I finally got time to post a blog, and interact with all you fine people. All kidding aside, you, yeah you, should feel special. While I devote the majority of my time to my family and work, blogging has taken a lot of time from my 3rd favorite past time. An activity that's been with me circa 27 years. That's right, I find my time to spend with my virtual friends (that's You) by playing less video games. True, I knew there would come a day when I would have to let go of gaming (slightly).
Okay, where were we. Right - snow Wed. morning. I was in such a good mood that I thought I'd change the light bulbs in the garage that someone has been bugging me about. So, I risk life and limb balancing on a plastic ladder to successfully change the light in the ceiling.
That went so well, I thought I'd change the light in the garage door opener as well. That's when it happened. I was accosted! Violated, I tell you!
Upon removing the cover to the light on the opener, these "things" jumped out at me. I can only assume that they are the result of some fiendish experiment, or possibly the result of radiation exposure.
I can only imagine the battle that was waged inside the light cover, as these two behemoths went at it. The hills on the coaster just got much, much bigger.
Most of Thursday was pretty uneventful, aside from the thousands, and I mean thousands of calls I continue to get from contractors. I submitted some info online (first mistake) about work I need done in my basement, and now everyone in a 100 mile sq. radius, who owns a hammer, is calling me.
I ended my day with the biggest hill of the week (or so I thought). Awhile back, many of you showered me and my family with kind words and encouragement. Echoing some of the thought others have shared, it was much appreciated, and refreshing to know there are still a lot of kind people out there.
Well, I have to call on you again! While it may be too soon for me to be searching for more sympathy, I'm really backed into a corner here! You see, I found out that I have to have a root canal. After years of putting my body through hell, I am accustomed to a certain amount of pain, mostly in my knees and back. However, there are 2 places, where I cannot tolerate ANY pain and/or discomfort - My eyes and my mouth.
I have requested to be put to sleep for the procedure - we'll see how that goes. I'm sure I would be properly numbed up, but that is not really the problem.
What I hate about having things done at the dentist - Even though you usually cannot feel anything, you can still tell what they are doing. When I had a tooth pulled, I did not feel it, but I knew what what happening when my head jerked. When I had fillings done, I did not feel it, but I could still see and smell the smoke coming out of my mouth.
I am NOT looking forward to this! On the bright side, though, I now have Vicodin to help deal with the pain until I have it done. Wish me luck.
W.W.J.D? - Lure one of those silly contractors to the house. Disable them quietly, as to draw no attention to himself, for a short time. Take a pair of pliers from their tool box, and remove the bad tooth with one swift pull. Problem solved and money saved. He would no doubt now be able to make a cool new whistling noise with the extra space.
Have a Great Weekend!
Baba Ganoush, Out.
